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"What are you laughing at?"- Steady Freddy

Started by Sven2, June 28, 2010, 08:55:18 PM

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Sven2

Salt on a melon
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Sven2

If you met John Monad, you would...

1.Take him in, and abuse his magic credit card.
2.Start believing in God.
3.Bone him.
4.Knife him a couple of times and leave him for dead.

Vote.

That was a poll  from an article about JFC.
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Eccles

"Shape shifters."

What a great character. Thanks for the thread.

Waxon

Quote from: Sven2 on June 28, 2010, 08:58:09 PM
If you met John Monad, you would...

1.Take him in, and abuse his magic credit card.
2.Start believing in God.
3.Bone him.
4.Knife him a couple of times and leave him for dead.


5. All of the above

Sven2

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Eccles

If you met John Monad, you would...


1.Take him in, and abuse his magic credit card.

Eccles, magic credit card in hand, calmly speaks on the phone: "Just deliver it to the Snug Harbor Motel and it'll get to me. Yes, of course I'll treat it in a humane fashion. It'll be the most pampered seal that ever lived. Now, and this is important, are you absolutely positive it'll bark my name?"

2.Start believing in God.

No, but I would build him a shrine.

3.Bone him.

First let me think whether I have any metal parts which conduct heat. It matters.

4.Knife him a couple of times and leave him for dead.

The charges: Kidnapping, assault with a deadly weapon, larceny by force, attempted murder, littering.



Sven2

#6
Quote from: Eccles on June 30, 2010, 09:24:04 AM
If you met John Monad, you would...
4.Knife him a couple of times and leave him for dead.

The charges: Kidnapping, assault with a deadly weapon, larceny by force, attempted murder, littering.

??? :D

Comes to mind the sleazy lawyer in "Breaking Bad", (Saul Goodman, I think is his name), who is presently meeting Vato and his cohort in his office:

"We would obviously move to dismiss all charges,  let's say..... the alleged victim went into the bus voluntarily, to discuss.... hmm... the details of local beer production..... the so called deadly weapon is a tool of the trade for the defendants who are currently and lawfully employed -if you need the papers it's doable, for the additional fee!.... so.... as seasonal workers for ..... the Monsanto corporation...... as to the lesser charge of littering, can prosecution present evidence ? Aha!  No body, no evidence!
Your job, my dears is to corral as a friendly witness a certain wacko ex-cop Bill Jacks. He was heard stating that the vic "can't get hurt, doesn't get hurt". Be nice to him, no more knife wounds! The rest is..... after I receive my fee.  Now, if you excuse me, I have to attend to other clients".

Or something like that. I think unless John himself appears in court the case is hard to prosecute.

Thank you, Eccles, you made an invaluable contribution to John's curriculum vitae.  :)
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Sven2

#7
Barcode clock, accurate, watch! Eastern time for me, is that different for other time zones I don't know.

More of a novelty, a curiosity than humor, of course.

http://www.barcodeart.com/artwork/clocks/barcode/index.html

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Sven2

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laurel

Breaking News, you can't use. Chrysler motor company is coming out with a new car that runs on water , unfortunately you need to pump the water from the gulf of Mexico ;).....

Sven2

Yep, that's the proof!

"Vietnam's Version of an "Innocence Project": "Traditional medicine" practitioner Pham Thi Hong is credited with freeing three men who had been convicted of a rape in 2000 and were serving 16-year prison sentences. According to Hong, men with certain small spots on their ears are virgins, and since the men still have their spots, they could not have committed rape. (Although Vietnam's President Nguyen Minh Triet was reportedly impressed with Hong's work and thus ordered the case re-opened, discovery of additional errors by police and prosecutors contributed to the recent decision to release the men.)"
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Sven2

From "What men don't know about women". (Yes, we sometimes read "Cosmopolitan" and "Esquire" too!)

Alissa Milano, actress: "Women are innately self-conscious. This is not a choice; it's a genderwide condition. On a bad day, I look in the mirror and see my ten-pound-heavier alter ego. Her name is Bertha. On a really bad day, Bertha sees her two-hundred-pound-heavier alter ego. Her name is Brian Dennehy."

Who the hell is Brian Dennehy though?

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SaveJFC Admin

Brian Dennehy is a character actor who has been working since 1977.  He's a good actor and when you see him you should recognize him...


http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001133/

BRIAN DENNEHY: Stars are Like 4 Year-Olds
Work here, Cass.

Sven2

Sure I know the man, is he 2000000 pounds?


As I got hit on the head today by a can of diced tomatoes fallen from the top shelf....  I relate.
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